How I Protect Myself From “Wellness Guilt”

I want to talk about something I don’t hear talked about enough in the health and wellness space and that’s the "wellness guilt".

How I protect myself from it, and how I’ve learned to indulge without stressing about every little thing.

Balance is something I have now… but it definitely didn’t start that way and I wasn't always health and wellness obsessed.

It’s because I was battling so many different health issues for so long that things had to be black and white in order for me to heal.

It started with major gut issues. Then botox poisoning. Then MCAS. Then breast implant illness. Years and years of different problems that forced me to become extremely focused on my health.

I didn’t have the luxury of balance back then.

I had to be strict.

And I’m actually not mad about it. I’m grateful for what those years taught me. I built habits and foundations that completely changed my life, and I learned what truly works for me.

Because perfection is not for me and it never has been.

That’s why my motto has always been:
"perfect skin doesn’t exist, healthy skin does."

And honestly, perfect wellness doesn't exist either.

If I’m being real, I still do the most when it comes to my health. More than the majority of people.

When I’m home, I cook almost 99% of my meals. obviously consistent with my skincare, I do red light therapy, sauna, supplements, peptides, I don't get botox, I use clean products, I have air filters all over my house, I get healthy sun exposure, PEMF mat daily, vibration plate daily, workout (a little), I don't eat after 6pm, in bed by 10pm, prioritize quality sleep, drinking and showering in filtered water, not drinking caffeine on an empty stomach, avoiding gluten, seed oils, sugar, alcohol, and processed foods, etc. etc. etc.

I don’t take medications.
I don’t take antibiotics.
I don’t even go to the doctor.

So I feel pretty solid in the routines I’ve built at home.

And even that can sometimes feel like a lot considering I’m balancing all of this with a full-time work schedule, and I don’t even have kids! Ps - I fully sympathize with parents trying to stay on top of their health while managing everything else life requires.

All of that to say…

When I go out of town, or certain occasions come up, I do whatever I want.

What does that actually mean?

I eat whatever sounds good. I don’t ask restaurants what oils they cook with to make sure I’m avoiding seed oils. I don’t ask for the gluten-free option. I don’t only order protein. I get dessert.

And yes, I’ll even have a drink now which is new for me, and something I’ll get into more later.

This wasn’t always me.

I used to be the girl who ordered a bare steak, no seasoning, no oil, maybe a side of steamed asparagus and water with lemon.

Not because I was trying to be some crazy health freak, but because my gut was a mess. I had histamine responses. I had issue after issue that kept me from enjoying the things I actually wanted to enjoy.

Because I was so strict, because I worked hard and sacrificed the things I wanted, I was able to heal.

And that healing gave me the freedom to experience balance today.

I just got back home from a two-week trip to New York and Connecticut where I ate and indulged in literally everything and enjoyed every fucking minute of it.

And that doesn’t mean I don’t care about my health.

It doesn’t mean I suddenly think these foods or ingredients can’t negatively impact your gut, your skin, or your overall health.

It also doesn’t mean this approach will work for everyone. It definitely didn’t work for me for years when I desperately wanted to eat what everyone else was eating.

Those years of restriction honestly felt traumatizing, and I think that’s exactly why I have the perspective on balance that I do today.

Because I still know the truth.

I still know seed oils are inflammatory and create oxidative stress.
I still know American gluten quality is terrible and hard for many bodies to digest.
I still know refined sugar and alcohol are technically poison.
I still know whole, real food is better than processed food.

All of that still crosses my mind when I eat something I don’t fully control.

But I don’t let it ruin my day anymore.

When I get home, my routine naturally comes back into full force.  Not because I feel guilty, but because it’s something I genuinely enjoy.

I love cooking.
I love the healthy food I make.
I feel lucky to have access to high-quality, fresh food.
I know what heals me and nourishes my body.

But I also know what feeds my soul and brings me joy.

And life is too short to ignore that.

Losing my sister-in-law Lacey changed something in me. It gave me a different perspective on living life.

Yes, your health should be a priority.

But life is also meant to be lived.

Both things can be true at the same time, and I’m finally allowing that for myself.

Do whatever is right for you, but understand that everyone’s health journey looks different and it’s not linear.

If you’re sick and trying to heal, your version of balance might look like restriction right now. Indulging might need to be on pause and that’s okay.

That doesn’t mean it’s forever.

Find what you need to do to heal and make that your priority, knowing it may just be a season.

Even if that season lasts years like it did for me.

Because standing on the other side of it now, looking back, I can say it was worth it.

And something else I’ve learned through all of this, maybe the biggest lesson of all, is that stressing and obsessing over every single health decision can end up being worse for your body than the thing you’re worried about in the first place.

Constantly over analyzing food, fearing ingredients, feeling anxious at dinners, or carrying guilt after enjoying something isn’t health.

That’s stress.

And stress destroys your nervous system, your digestion, your hormones, your skin,  everything we’re supposedly trying to protect.

There was a time when I thought being hyper-controlled meant I was doing wellness “right.”

Now I realize that peace, enjoyment, and feeling relaxed in your life are just as important as anything on your plate.

At the end of the day, I protect my health when I need to.
And I protect my peace too.

I don’t live in fear of food anymore.
I don’t live in obsession.
And I don’t live in guilt.

I live in awareness.

And for me, that’s the balance.

xo,

Jamie